Game Review #7: Skullgirls

While I won't go into much detail about my experience with six button fighters, I will tell you that Ancient Greek mathematicians can comprehend it. Ya see that's a reference to how Greeks had no concept of zero, but that's not for you. That's for the scholars who discover these reviews in a thousand years and wonder why this guy wasn't appreciated sooner. But back to the topic at hand, my only real fighting game experience is with the various renditions of Smash Bros. which are similar to six button fighting games the same way Abraham Lincoln is similar to Colonel Sanders. So I didn't go into Skull Girls expecting to be good. Instead I went in thinking "I spent $10.01 to get this game and six others off Humble Bundle, so I'm gonna get my (ridiculously small amount of) money's worth!" And I did.Skull Girls is an indie fighting game that uses mechanics similar to Marvel vs. Capcom with its own changes here and there. The controls are easy to get used to, unless you intend on using the special attack commands in which case you'll end up dying while figuring out how to do a quarter circle on a keyboard. You could of course use a controller, but then you have to deal with the unnatural control scheme of six button fighters on four button controllers. But hey there's always those bulky, expensive, and insufferably difficult to set up six button fight sticks that the pros use. Ya know what, why am I even complaining? It's totally worth it to get one of those things when I got this game from Steam's version of Goodwill. But enough about stupid generalizations. Let's get on to what this game does well. The actual fighting is intensely satisfying and feels like you're actually beating the crap out of your opponent when you are, unlike some games where you basically just have to know that you're winning. That type of game is something I like to call a "Numeric Showdown" wherein the only way you're able to tell that anything is happening is by seeing numbers go up and down, or sometimes hidden from view by the sight of people poking each other. The antagonist to this is the type of game where you can feel the game reacting to you doing well of tending by ramping up the action or making it easier for you to keep on kicking people's shit in. Skull Girls does both of these well, giving you easy access to huge combo strings without making inescapable combos. The characters each have unique ideas behind them each with their own back story that you can already tell a lot of from just their appearance, but gets revealed in further depth in the various renditions of the story mode. They also each have an outside the box moveset that usually involves several ideas that you'd never see in any other fighting game. Even the DLC characters (which I got for free #humblebundledealhunting) have a ton of thought put into them to the point where they're nearly indistinguishable from characters available at launch. To demonstrate this, let's take my main, Beowulf, and look at him from a bunch of perspectives. His character design is interesting along with his moveset design (I mean, he hits people with a folding chair in so many different ways); he has an awesome backstory in his story mode; his voice acting is exceptional; he has noticeable work put into his animation; and his personality is a high point of the game. Just look at his lines:"I'm 287 pounds of folded steel, and sex appeal!""Step on board the AROO train!""The line for autographs starts here!""Say your vitamins and eat your prayers!""Everything I say is a catchphrase!"This, ladies and gentlemen, is DLC done right.As I'm writing this, Skull Girls with all its DLC is still on Humble Bundle for a few more days, so I'd check it out if I were you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have like 5 other games to play. All in the name of charity of course.

Game Review #6: The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds

Today, I'd like to start the review with certifiable proof that GameStop wants to kill you. Earlier this summer, I entered GameStop intent on buying a Zelda game. I ended up having to pick from the 3DS titles, and guess what they maniacally put right next to each other? A Link Between World's and Majora's Mask 3D. So, while my parents waited for me in the car, I stood there in the 3DS section of GameStop, staring at two games, deciding if I wanted Nintendo to feed off my unfiltered nostalgia from a top-down perspective or a third person perspective. My final decision was A Link Between Worlds due to the fact that I knew just about nothing about it to begin with and I figured it would be a much more fresh experience for me. One of the worries I had was the idea that it was going to be difficult and actually make me think. The first time I played Ocarina of Time, I actually had no idea what I was doing at all and when I finally looked at a walk through, I wondered how I was supposed to think of things like this on my own. That's not to say I thought it was a bad game. I just didn't enjoy its puzzles because I thought they were too god damn hard. And I know they were supposed to be rewarding to realize what you're supposed to do, but they just never were for me. Well, before I piss off OoT fans anymore, let me say that when I finally got into A Link Between Worlds, I was pleasantly surprised to find that it was a lot easier than most Zelda games. I only had to consult a guide once or twice for the main completion. It's usually pretty obvious how you're supposed to interact with the environment and if it's something you don't know about yet, then the game will outright tell you what you're supposed to do but it never feels like the game is holding your hand. Realizing your objective feels rewarding and almost tricked me into thinking that I was smart a few times. Damn deceiving games. 

The thing that makes this game unique is that it takes "open world" a step further by not only letting you go to any part of the map you can get to, you can also get to these places whenever you want because you have to access to all the items from the beginning and, after a certain point, you can do the dungeons in any order. To get most of the main items, you have to either rent them for a low price or buy them for a much larger price both from a hilarious little bunny man who stole your house (which, by the way, tortured me by having a Majora's Mask decoration on the wall). This however doesn't take away from the exploration aspect of the game. Instead of finding a useful item in a dungeon, you'll find chests with large amounts of rupees or keys to get further in the dungeon or, in special situations, more obscure items like better gear or ways to upgrade your weapon. And since you can do dungeons in any order, you can have two playthroughs where you have completely different gear at different times. Maybe you want to get the better clothes more than you want the Master Sword upgrade; then, you can go to the dungeon with the clothes before you go to the ones with the Master Ore. Or maybe you want to get the Sand Rod as quickly as possible so you can do the Sand Temple; then, you can go to the dungeon that unlocks the Sand Rod in the item store first. On top of all that, there's also a huge collect quest to find 100 little shellfish and figure out how to pick them up in various ways, and with each multiple of ten you go through, you can upgrade one of your purchased items. The system of heart pieces of course returns. And now that all that is out of the way, let's address the elephant in the room, or rather the painting of the elephant in the room. This game's main catch is its new ability to merge into the walls as a painting to cross gaps, sneak up on people, and pop things out of the walls when they're stuck in them. To be honest, this may be my favorite special mechanic in any Zelda game. While I do enjoy masks (stop thinking about that game, Jack!), the merge mechanic added a simplistic yet brilliant puzzle solving mechanic that was also quick and easy to use. Also, the limitation of having a specific energy bar that you need to work within the constraints of is incredibly fair and challenging and, being tied in with your items limitations, makes it important to take your time, strategize, and refrain from spamming these abilities. 

The story is one of my favorites, possibly even topping Skyward Sword in that respect. This game adds Lorule, Hyrule's uncreatively named counterpart, as a setting for most of the game, much like Termi-NO NO NO NOT THIS AGAIN. Anyway, there's a guy trapping sages in Picasso-esque paintings and you need to get the Master Sword to beat him. Oh no, Zelda's gone again? Better go through this crack in the wall. Completely new world? No biggy. Ganon's back. Sure, bring it on. Wait, a new princess?! Sign me up for that! Oh, I have to go find the sages. Fine. And that's all that I feel the need to say about it. It's simple, but it's still a great story perhaps even because of this simplicity. Maybe that's why I like this game so much. It's simplicity in both story and gameplay really helped this game. It's easy to pick up casually and just play for a little and then go do other stuff. And for those of you who are worried that you need to play A Link to the Past to fully enjoy this game, bear in mind that this entire review was written by someone who's never played A Link to the Past although now I intend on it since this game was so amazing. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to play Majora's Mask 3D because  I had so little will power that less than a week later I went back and bought it too. And that, kids, is the story of how I learned the true meaning of corporate manipulation.

Game Review #5: Pokemon Omega Ruby (and basically Apha Sapphire)

Pokemon. Ok, now that you've already decided that this is the best review ever, I'm off to go enjoy the astounding praise that will obviously never end. Goodbye.

Oh what's that? You're still here? What more could you want? I mentioned Pokemon, left, chugged a Redbull, and then posted this online. Perfect review right there! Fine, I'll make a better one.

If it hasn't dawned on any of you yet, I'm pretty damn young. Like, born-the-same-year-Majora's-Mask-came-out young. So, by the time I was into gaming, Pokemon was going nowhere but up and I was their stereotypical target audience. Like seriously, Google "child that probably loves Pokemon", and you'll find a little me in your search results. So, yeah, Pokemon has always sort of been one of those childhood things that I'll always go back to, right next to Yugioh and Kraft Macaroni & Cheese. And, on my most recent trip back to it, I took a trip down memory lane with Pokemon Omega Ruby for the 3DS, a "remake" of Pokemon Ruby for the GBA, remake in quotes because this new one has so many differences, most people think the explanation is literally parallel universes. I picked Omega Ruby over Alpha Sapphire for really no other reason than Groudon looks cooler. The differences between the two really aren't that big if you really think about it. I mean, the teams switch places but that doesn't affect much of anything. 

So the first difference between the remake and the original is, of course, the fact that's it's 3D unlike the original 2D version. The art style almost makes me think of a 3D version of the anime. It's definitely not trying to look super next-gen but the graphics look smooth more than anything. Also, several characters were redesigned or were changed in some way in the story. Archie and Maxie look very different in ways that reflect their drastic personality changes, Maxie becoming a scientist and Archie becoming a full-on pirate. The role of your two rivals, May and Wally, are improved, May battling you more times as well as being more of an ally to your character, and Wally being more likable than before and evolving his Ralts into a Gallade instead of a Gardevoir (most likely because just a year before, Pokemon X/Y's champion used a Gardevoir as her boss Pokemon). I personally loved what they did to your rivals, since I always thought that the rival system in Ruby/Sapphire was done completely wrong. I thought May was underused, disappearing after your third or fourth battle with her, and Wally was annoying. As for Steven, I love his redesign more than anything in the entire world. Dropping his baggy outfit for a fitted suit, Steven is constantly referred to as a "pretty boy" or "handsome" or anything along the lines of that. And to be honest, I couldn't help but agree. I mean, I'm not gay or anything... Not that there's anything wrong with that...(crap, this is going south fast. Think! What do people like?) HEY, NEW MEGA EVOLUTIONS, HUH? Since this is a remake, new Megas sort of take the place of completely new Pokemon in a main title. I actually enjoy just about all of them. Mega Sabeleye is my favorite Mega, Mega Sceptile reaffirmed my love for Treecko, and Mega Rayquaza literally had to be banned from the banned tier. Nintendo be like "You got a problem?" The problem I had with Mega Evolution in this game, though, is the way it's sort of forced into the game. The scene where you go to the island with one of the Eon Duo and it sort of just joins your party always felt like it came out of nowhere. And that's sort of the thing that made me realize that from now on, every Pokemon game is gonna have to either treat Mega Evolution like its the most important part of the game or just throw it in there like its nothing and neither is all that great. So in closing, although I don't usually do numerical ratings, if I were to give this game one, it would be 7.8/10 for not enough water. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to go shiny hunting. By the way, if someone wonder trades you a level 1 Cyndaquil, you know who it's from.